Chapter XXXVI: 🔥 Wiglaf Pulls Up: Loyalty Mode Activated 🔥

So Wiglaf — certified Wægmunding heir, not some mid NPC — saw his bestie Beowulf out here gettin' cooked by a whole ✨rage-quit dragon✨ 🐉💀. Bro was FR melting under his drip (aka armor) like a popsicle in Ohio summer ☀️🧌.

And Wiglaf was like:

“Bet. This ain’t it. Not while I got this legendary loot in my stash 💼🗡️.”

He remembered how Beowulf once gave him the deed to the clan crib 🏡 + OG family heirlooms, like:

💛 A flex-tier yellow shield (crafted in the fires of Sigma Rizzgard)
⚔️ An antique sword that literally clapped a banished prince named Eanmund (RIP bozo)
🪖 A helmet and chainmail with mad lore — loot from his dad Weohstan, who solo'd a royal and never even bragged about it. Peak silent sigma 💯.

Wiglaf had been holding that treasure quietly grinding XP until he leveled up to be a real one like his pops. Now? He’s unlocked: Loyal Homie Mode™ 😤🛡️

🧃Flashback Vibes: Meadhall Promises Gone Real

Wiglaf turned to the squad (aka the L-crew who ditched Beowulf) and dropped a speech so fire it burned harder than the dragon:

“Y’all remember when we were sipping that mead like 👑s and said, ‘If Beowulf ever needs backup, we GOT him?’ Yeah… me too. Now look. Man's in a 1v1 with a nuclear lizard from hell and y’all just standing here like NPCs tryna respawn 💀💀💀.

He believed in us. Gave us the bling 💎, picked us for this final boss battle. And what do we do? Fold like lawn chairs 😤. Not me, bro. I’d rather get barbecued than let the GOAT down. If he dies, we ALL caught the L. That’s not just his fight. It’s OURS now. No cap. 🐺🔥”

⚔️ Wiglaf Enters the Chat: CO-OP Mode Unlocked

So my boy Wiglaf drops the inspirational TED Talk, then sprints in like:

“Ayo Beowulf‼️ You said you’d solo this, but let’s tag-team this baddie like Smash Bros 💪🔥 LET’S GOOO.”

And right as he says that, Dragon.exe reboots again, enters ANGRY MODE 🔥🐉😡, and starts breathing straight lava — like man was out here tossing fireballs like it’s Mario Kart: Hell Edition 🍄💨.

Wiglaf’s shield? 💀 Got ratio’d by fire. Literally became ash in 2.5 seconds. But this young king didn’t flinch. He slid under Beowulf’s shield like a pro baller on defense 🛡️🏀.

📉 Beowulf's Sword = L-Tier Now

Beowulf, being the OG sigma warlord, wasn’t about to let the moment pass. He whipped out his trustiest sword — Nægling — and swung that thing with the power of 1,000 chest days 💥💪

BUT THEN... 💔

Nægling said “nah fam” and just shattered. Like for real, the blade was like:

“Uhhh your strength is TOO based, can’t handle it 😭📉”

Turns out Beowulf was so cracked, he literally nerfed his own sword. Iron couldn’t keep up with this man’s grindset. Devs gotta patch this fr.

🐉 Final Boss Says “GET OVER HERE”

That Ohio dragon, on his third try, said:

“Time to finish this. Fatality mode: ENGAGED.”

He lunges in and bites Beowulf’s neck like a cursed vampire snapping for clout 👹🩸. Blood = everywhere. Whole vibe turned into a horror-core music video real quick.

🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥

Next episode finna be wild. Will Beowulf clutch the dub? Or is the grind finally over? Stay tuned 😤📺